2018 was the most challenging year of my life. I received news that would change my life forever. A diagnosis that hit me like a ton of bricks and would alter my life course. I went from bike riding, teaching yoga, and working full time as a teacher, to being confined to a hospital room. My body now felt as though it was no longer my own, but a landscape for science and medicine. I endured several rounds of chemo, invasive procedures, and rapid changes in my physical and mental state. I was stripped of my physical strength, my weight, my hair, my practice and many other things I clung to. Suddenly, I had to choose whether to live fully and fight, or give in.
I made up in my mind I wasn’t here to give up. I was here to triumph. I held on to this idea through every moment I experienced fear, pain and sorrow. I would say out loud, “This will not be my life.” I was faced with learning how to spiritually grow through stillness in the midst of an experience testing every fiber of my being. In that stillness, I began to discover myself. I discovered grace. A word that was beautifully appointed by my closest friend in my darkest time.? ?
Yoga isn’t just helping me heal, it’s helping me live. It aided me in fortifying my mind, body and spirit. It helped me understand a new concept of strength, helping me soar over each medical hurdle I faced. I claimed remission and 8 months later, here I am in remission, cancer FREE. Continued healing in my navigation of this second life is a process I work towards through yoga and an evolving spiritual practice. With each day there may be a new challenge and it may thwart you. Keep going anyway. Personal growth is not linear. There may be loops, triggers, setbacks or repeated patterns, but each is designed to help you learn and propel you further.
You are more than a diagnosis. You are a soul having experiences bringing you to and through circumstances contributing to growth. You are a source of light made to shine brighter than your wildest dreams. Believe in this, believe in yourself and believe you are
uniquely crafted to inspire. Thanks Pathways Country Yoga Retreats. I feel blessed.